Chapter 12: At Peace With The Afterlife
An excerpt from You Have Chosen to Remember: A Journey of Self-Awareness, Peace of Mind and Joy by James Blanchard Cisneros.
You might feel that you have a relatively good idea of the afterlife and where loved ones go after they have passed on. Yet with all this understanding, faith and trust, it is perfectly okay to grieve. Grieving has nothing to do with your understanding or lack of it. Grieving simply has to do with feeling whatever it is you need to feel for however long you believe you need to feel it. People should be allowed to grieve in whatever way they believe they need to grieve. Allow them the space they need. Listen to them. Pray for their peace, and pray for the departed one.
At no time in this chapter do I try to advise you on how you should feel or react to a loved one’s passing. There is no one correct way of acting or reacting to such an event. And no one, regardless of how knowledgeable he or she believes himself or herself to be, should ever judge another brother or sister for how he or she chooses to react, or how long he or she chooses to grieve. There might well come a time when your brother or sister might appreciate some clarity with regard to the afterlife. When that time comes you will know it, but before then, your ear, compassion and prayers will be very much appreciated.
The following excerpt was written by Joseph Bayly in his book, “A View from the Hearse,” after he laid three of his sons to rest. It may give you some insight on how to comfort loved ones as they grieve.
38 I was sitting, torn by grief. Someone came and talked to me of God’s dealings, of why it happened, of hope beyond the grave. He talked constantly; he said things I knew were true. I was unmoved except to wish he’d go away. He finally did.
Another came and sat beside me. He just sat beside me for an hour and more, listened when I said something, answered briefly, prayed simply, left. I was moved. I was comforted. I hated to see him go.
This section, as well as this entire book, is written with absolute respect for whatever you personally believe you need to go through to reach a more peaceful place. However, I believe this chapter will bring you to a more peaceful place within your heart and mind when it comes to the subject of the afterlife. I have reached a peaceful place with regard to this subject and, as I’ve said before, you and I have a lot more in common than your ego might currently allow you to perceive. Thus, if I can find a more peaceful place, so can you. I, as well as many people before me, have crossed the spiritual and mental barriers that the ego has told us exist between ourselves, our departed brothers and sisters and the afterlife.
38. Joseph Bayly, A View from the Hearse, Copyright 1985 (Life-Journey Books).
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I used to think I would never get over my brother’s death by suicide…Two years later I know I will never get over it.. But I also know I have a story to share with others who may be having a hard time. Sometimes I get off track into anger and that isn’t a pleasant place to be then I go online. Search today I came to Forgiveness so I stopped and started reading…I can’t wait for the book to arrive to read more and find some peace.
What happens if u cant get over the death of someone?