Ask the Author: Question & Response
I was moved when reading some of your work. I have a belief that everyone has the capacity to love themselves and others, and I am always overwhelmed with emotion when individuals express this. But at the same time it hurts when people don’t – through criticism, hate and malice. How can I change my reaction so that I am not so fearful of other’s negativity, as this has paralyzed me in the past and paralyzes me in the present?
– Jacqueline, Bolton, England
You ask: “How can I change my reaction so that I am not so fearful of other’s negativity?” You have already taken the first step by reclaiming your power.
For it is not what people do that affects you, but how you react within your mind to what people do. Understanding that the power to change lies within is the first step in taking control over your perceptions, over how you choose to view the world.
Imagine a God of love, and only love. Imagine all of us being an extension of this God. Imagine if this love was all that we are. Imagine if we communicated with each other through different expressions of this love. How would it come across? Imagine if the “positive” expression was the act or sharing of love, and the “negative” expression was the call or search for love. Thus, imagine if any time we reacted “negatively,” be it through expressions of criticism, hate, malice or fear, all we were really doing was asking, calling or searching for love in the best way we knew how. My friend, when babies or young children cry, what are they really asking for? Regardless of the reason they have, are they not asking, by their actions, to be comforted and loved? Have you observed young adults, or adults in general, behaving in this same manner? Through personal experiences, they learned different ways of asking, calling or searching for comfort and love.
Expressions of criticism, hate, malice and all other “negative” expressions have fear and confusion as their base. Would you judge someone who is fearful and confused, or would you try to hold and comfort this person? Would you criticize a confused man on the street, or would you try to help him? Would you antagonize a fearful child, or would you comfort the child? When anyone, regardless of age, wakes up scared because of a nightmare, do you judge and ridicule the person, or do you listen to what she has to say and reassure her that she is now safe?
Isn’t it gratifying to help bring peace to someone who was afraid, or bring comfort to someone who was confused? Would you not feel honored that God had enough faith in you to bring a scared or confused individual into your presence so that you might turn the light on and remind this person that her nightmare is over and she is now safe. My dear friend, out of seven billion people, God has chosen you to help bring His children into the light. Wouldn’t you stand fearless and tall if you knew God walks with you? If you knew God has chosen you and has faith and trust in you to bring His children home, would you not stand up confidently and deliver? Trust that God stands not only with you, but also in you, and whenever fear comes knocking at the door, laugh the fear away.
Now imagine reinterpreting the events that you once perceived with hurt and fear as opportunities presented to you by God to assist brothers and sisters in bringing them home. Imagine reinterpreting events that you once defined as criticism, hate, negativity and malice as God’s children simply asking for help, comfort and love in the best way they know how. How would this simple reinterpretation within your mind change your life? You have tried it the ego’s way long enough. Allow yourself to try it God’s way, and you will find your days being filled with more and more peace and gratitude.
If you would trust God and try it His way, would that negativity that you once saw people expressing turn into a call for assistance, a call for love? Wouldn’t peace start replacing fear in your daily experience? Wouldn’t understanding replace criticism? Wouldn’t love replace hate? Wouldn’t kindness replace malice? Wouldn’t your increased confidence replace your self-doubt? Wouldn’t hope and gratitude replace the hurt you once felt?
My dear friend, imagine the unending gratitude you would feel for any person who comforted your child during difficult times. Imagine the appreciation you would show a stranger for bringing your lost child home. Now multiply this a thousand times and that comes close to the gratitude God has for you every time you listen to and answer a child of God’s call for help, assistance and love – with help, assistance and love.
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The article about seeing negativity as someones way to ask for help and love as the best way they know how really shed light on my current relationship and some past relationships. I thank you for opening my eyes. This will make my life alot more peaceful. It was exactly what i needed to hear to heal my relationship. thanks again.